Letter to … my dad, whose heavy drinking is out of control

The letter you always wanted to write

I can’t remember a time before you drank. As children, we quickly learned to spot the signs. You would become progressively louder and more argumentative before taking offence at some perceived slight and losing your temper. I have no idea if you remember all the terrible things you have said and done while drunk. If you do, you have never apologised. The hurt and the sadness is for the rest of us to bear, while you carry on as if everything is fine.

It is harming your health. No one can drink as much as you do and be OK. But the first heart attack didn’t register, and neither did the next. Stress, you said. I need to relax. As soon as you got home from the hospital, you made yourself a drink. We let you. How do you stop a grown man drinking? We must have poured away gallons of whisky over the years, but you just buy more. Besides, you have made it clear: either we accept your alcoholism, or we lose you. If it ever comes down to it, you will always choose the bottle. It is what alcoholics do.

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from The Guardian http://ift.tt/2zNwMKx